10 More Simple Sayings to Break Down Hard Concepts for Kids

A few years ago, I wrote a post called 7 Simple Sayings. In it, I shared 7 phrases that break down the hard concepts we expect our children to understand instinctively but, in reality, how could they?

I mean, what does “calm down” mean to a kid any way? Or an adult?!

Ever fussed at your child to “think”! 

Instead of exhausting ourselves and our children, we can use simple sayings that break down hard sayings into more relatable and actionable bites. Ironically, breaking the concept down tends to give us, as parents, a little more compassion for our children. Instead of being annoyed by their mistakes, we begin to see them as life-lessons with which we can assist.

Here are ten more simple sayings  I learned from my friends that really do help break down hard concepts for our children and for us parents, too!

Simple Sayings about Character

1. Parkers Don’t Lie

Ever have a value that doesn’t seem to line up with that of other families. Perhaps you don’t let your kids watch particular programs. Maybe you don’t let your kids say certain words because they are crude to your family but other families might not consider them as crass. Instead of throwing other families under the bus for having different values than your own, you can use a phrase like this to set a standard for your family.

“But mommy, so-n-so’s parents lets them stay up until 10.” 

“That is their decision but Parker kids go to bed at 8”.

Additionally, your child also can rest in knowing she is not the only one expected to act this way.

“Parkers don’t lie” means mommy doesn’t lie.

“Parkers are kind” means that daddy is going to be kind, too.

So the next time your child acts in a way contrary to your family values, try saying: “{Insert your family name} don’t {insert the activity}”

2. When you lie, it hurts others and it hurts you.

Sometimes we don’t realize that our actions hurt other people let alone ourselves. Instead of a lecture on why lying is wrong, my friend Ruth talks about the most basic consequence: lying brings hurt. When a child understands the emotional affect of an action, they’ll be more likely to correct their behavior.

When you catch your child in a lie, look at them with eyes of compassion and say: When you lie, it hurts others and it hurts you.

3. Glow in the Dark

When the kids leave for school, I have a LIST of statements I throw at them. Things like “Be a good helper but don’t be afraid to ask for help”. “If Jesus is the boss of your life, live like it”. “Be kind. Have fun”. And then my friend Leslie, shared this simple statement with me. I can tell my kids to glow in the dark and that means be a kind and generous friend. It also means love like Jesus and it also reminds them they are not alone because of who is always with them.

When you’re child leaves for school, skip the list of reminders and simply charge them to: Glow in the dark!

Simple Sayings about Emotions

4. You can choose to be happy or choose to be sad. Which do you choose?

Ever have a kid wake up on the wrong side of the proverbial bed? And what if it happens a week in a row. It’s exhausting to deal with the moody behavior of our kids. Perhaps all they really need is a simple explanation that they are in control of their feelings. They are choosing to be grumpy. They can also choose to have a good attitude. Cure those Eyores with this simple statement:

You can choose to be happy or sad. Which do you choose?

5. It’s okay to have big feelings

Granted, I’m not talking about a child who is truly upset over a legitimate experience (even if it seems insignificant to you). We must always honor our kids feelings. I’ve heard it said that by the time a child is 6, he has the emotional capacity of an adult. Unfortunately, he lacks the emotional stamina and maturity to know how to handle those feelings. That’s where we as parents come in helping them understand those big feelings.

Tell your child: It’s okay to have big feelings

6. Because I love you, I won’t let you treat me that way.

I love the sentiment behind this statement. Ever had a moment when your child has flipped his lid and he starts spewing out unkind words or hits you or both? I think this is a great one to communicate both for the child and the parent. Children need to learn boundaries and how to work through their emotions without hurting themselves or others. 

Another way of saying this statement might be: ‘I know that you’re mad and that’s okay. But it’s not okay to  hurt people because you’re mad’.

Simple Sayings about Obedience

7. Do you need me to help you obey?

Sometimes our kids just need an out. If we see they are struggling to make the right decision, our response can make a huge difference. If you were about to make a wrong decision at work, also known as a mistake, would you rather a co-worker kindly point out that oversight or have them yell at you that you’re an idiot? Well, of course you would prefer a courteous intervention. Don’t you think our children would respond in a similar fashion if we kindly pointed out their error versus yelling at them for doing something wrong?

Try saying: Do you need me to help you obey?

8. There are good choices and bad choices. You have the ability to choose which one you make.

Anyone else grow tired of hearing: “Charlee made me do it!”.  This statement gives your child ownership of their actions. You can remind them that they know what is right and they know what is wrong and it is totally up to them which choice they make. 

When they try to shift blame tell them: There are good choices and bad choices. You have the ability to choose which one you make.

Simple Sayings about Empathy

9. Let’s imagine how that would feel

A quick google search says that empathy is “the ability to know and understand the feelings of another.” That is a hard concept for adults so consider the challenges for a child. Since kids are big on imagination, asking them to consider how they would feel in a similar situation is a great way to help grow that empathy muscle. Instead of scolding , walk them through their actions and the resulting pain that may have been caused. It may be difficult for them to be remorseful but the more they practice, the more aware of the consequences of their actions they can become.

Next time they act in a cruel way, encourage them with these words: “Let’s imagine how that would feel.” 

10. It’s brave to say you’re not ready to try something because you’re scared.

We live in a tough-guy kind of world. It can be very hard to admit when you’re scared or hesitant. It can be even harder as a parent to determine whether it’s a moment to push your child out of the nest or let them hide behind your wing for a little longer. I don’t have a chart or metric to give you to determine that but my friend Sarah has a great statement you can use with your children who are fearful or timid of something new.

Tell them: It’s brave to say you’re not ready to try something new because you’re scared. 

Simple Sayings Spoken with Love

“I love you when you’re happy and I love you when you’re sad. I love you when you’re good and I love you when you’re bad.”

Is this not the sweetest little poem?! My friend Beth shared it with me and I am in love with the sentiment. Our children need to know that we are in their corner no matter what. As you parent your sweet kids, choose your words with grace and love them deeply.

Special thanks to the following friends who helped contribute to the content contained in this post! You are amazing mommas who have been there, are there, or remember being there like it was yesterday!

Linda, Andrea, Beth, Leslie, Lisa, Sarah, Ruth, and Vanessa